The earliest I have a memory of abuse was at the age of 6. At age 7, I remember preparing for baptism, I was excited, I was optimistic that my sins would now be washed away, so now I could start a new life. Such a fairy tale I told myself!…
My story has roots going back stemming from before I was born but I don’t think it is my place to tell them right now. My personal story mostly begins when I was 9 or 10. After school one day my friend and I were talking about “sex”, I put “sex” in quotes because we…
Many years ago during a family trip to San Francisco where we walked across the Golden Gate Bridge, 11-year-old me stopped and peered down into the still, gently swirling water and tried to talk myself out of throwing my body into the soothing void. It seemed such an easy way to release the suffering that…
To begin, I will say that I was three when a man first took away my sexual agency. My father, a pedophile, showed me porn that included Rape, origies, and children. Fast forward, to age 12, when I had my first worthiness interview. Somehow, it felt normal, because it was for a group youth trip…
When I was 14 I reported my rape to my bishop. Except since I was 14 I didn’t know it was rape. I wasn’t even really sure what happened. My bishop, a man who I believe was doing his best, was untrained in such matters. I repented. For my rape. My rape went unreported and…
I was born into the LDS church, raised and lived my whole life in the heart of LDS country, Utah County. There’s no escaping the influence of LDS church because it is everywhere here, and most people are LDS. This type of situation leads to feeling like you are in an inescapable bubble of shame…
Upon my son’s cancer diagnosis at age 15 he said he did not want to live. He said he was a bad person. He then recounted the many times his bishop and seminary teacher had talked to him about “touching himself” over the previous 3 1/2 years. I was devastated and heart broken to know…
Hi my name is Val. I am 61 years old, been married for 39 years and the father of 5 sons. I am a victim of sexual abuse and the shame that was instilled in me at 17 by my bishop. My abuse started when I was around 5 years of age. I was sexually…
I was sixteen when I was called into the Bishop’s office – I didn’t know why. You see, I grew up in a “non-mormon” home with an agnostic dad until my parents got divorced – then my mom married a mormon man who insisted we all become mormon. I never fully realized what all this…
As a child I experienced repeated sexual abuse. I knew that I didn’t like what was happening to me, but I didn’t know exactly what it was and I didn’t want to talk about it with anyone. Due to my experiences I became sexualized in my early childhood and I began to explore this new…