#139 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,6,7
When I was fifteen and sixteen, I became involved with a man who was ten years my senior. He was sexually abusive and would be sexual with me despite my…
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Warning: Sexually Explicit content.
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Legend for Consequences Suffered (CS):
- Inappropriate shame and guilt
- Childhood self-loathing
- Adulthood self-loathing
- Normalizing children to sexual questions by adult men. (Grooming)
- Sexual abuse. (Pedophilia)
- Impaired sexual relations after marriage.
- Years of recovery from childhood shaming. Often lasting decades.
- Suicide Ideation
- Attempted Suicide
- Suicide of a loved one or friend.
#138 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,4,6,7,8
My story starts in a place I imagine many stories start. In the bath tub. It was around five years old that I first discovered that playing with myself felt…
#137 Name Hidden. CS: 1,3,6,7
When I turned 16, I had my bishops interview for a temple recommend. I was asked if I had sexual intercourse and when I said yes, my whole world fell…
#136 Name Hidden. CS: 1,4
I was inactive from the time I graduated High School until I was around 20. At that time, I decided to come back to church and “repent” for what I…
#135 Rachael CS: 1,2,3,4,7,8,9. Other: Shamed, rather than helped, after a rape
I was sexually abused at age 4 and again at age 7 by members of the Church. I learned early that extreme compliance was the way to keep safe. I…
#134 Kip K. CS: 1,2,3,4,6,7,8
We moved to a new ward when I was 13 and I discovered masturbation shortly after that. I didn’t discuss it with anyone, but I gleaned enough context around the…
#133 Heidi H. CS: 1,2,3,4,6,7,8
There are three bishops whom had the authority to declare the validity to my self worthiness: from taking the sacrament to going through the temple and onto serve a mission.…
#132 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,6,7,8
At 17, I was repeatedly asked specific questions by my bishop when I went in to confess the things I had done. I was asked whether I spit or swallowed.…
#131 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,6,7,8
When I was 17 I went to see my bishop after I felt my boyfriend and I had gone too far physically. He did ask me very specific details and…
#130 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3. Other: Breaking mandatory reporting laws
I joined the Church at the age of seventeen hoping it would fix things. I was being sexually abused by a teacher at my school who preyed on my vulnerabilities…
#129 L.R. CS: 1,2,3,6,7,8,9
I was ten. I stumbled across porn for the first time, and had kept it a secret from my parents as I knew they would be ashamed in me if…
#128 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3
As a teenager I had sex once, I talked to my bishop about it and he told me the cupcake analogy and told me that I was of less value…
#127 Name Hidden. CS: 4,6
I have a child currently at BYU-I. The bishop there has asked several students how often they plan to have sex after marriage (including our child). The bishop then proceeds…
#124 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,6,7
I am a fairly sensitive person that also deals with a guilty conscience, and as a young man in the church those interviews caused many years of psychological damage on…
#122 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3
I was told from the time I turned 12 that masturbation was a sin. I discovered masturbation by accident before that time and didn’t even know what it was. When…
#121 Name Hidden. CS: 1,4,6
When I was 19, I was working in a coffee shop. One of the regular customers, who was a non-member, but professed to be religiously observant, asked me out. I…
#119 Name Hidden. CS: 1,8. Other: Introduction of inappropriate ideas / suggestions about sexuality
I lived in Kansas for couple of years as a military dependent. I was in a ‘part member family’. I was about 14 years old at the time. Our Bishop…
#118 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,4,6,7,8,10. Other: Normalizing trust in socially accepted authority, sexism (trusting that men know better), extreme inappropriate guilt for normal and healthy sexual and mental behavior.
For those of you who haven’t lived in Utah, let me preface this story by introducing you to some facts of reality of living there. Utah County, a cluster of…
#117 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,7,8
I remember being asked in every interview if I was keeping the law of chastity. I had always answered ‘yes’ until I was 18. Me and my boyfriend at the…