#187 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,6,8

I was 14 when I was raped by a young man in my ward. I kept it to myself, shamed and fearful of telling anyone, because this young man was the son of my parents good friends. Two weeks after that event, I returned home from family vacation with a message on the answering machine…

#185 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,4,6,7,8

I didn’t realize what masturbation was until I was 13 and went to church. It began at the stake center, when I attended the audio portion of a general conference priesthood session. This was in the days when it wasn’t broadcast on TV. One of the speakers described a terrible, vile practice. Slowly I realized…

#184 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,4,6. Other: Fear of sex, gynecological exams, etc

I remember having to decide whether to confess to masturbation at my baptismal interview a few months shy of my eighth birthday. I decided to confess, since it was what god wanted, but chickened out when I was actually sitting in a room alone, across a heavy desk from my childhood bully’s dad, in my…

#183 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,4,6,7,8

When I was 16, I was dating my first real boyfriend. We would make out often and each time got more intense. When we began touching under our clothing my boyfriend decided we needed to go talk to our bishop (we were in the same ward). We went together and our Bishop reacted surprisingly appropriate.…

#182 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,6. Other: Desire to self-mutilate

I began masturabting when I was six years old and somehow already knew that I was “filthy” and “unloved by God”. I didn’t know it was called masturabtion until I was 17 years old, at which point I went and confessed to my bishop whom I loved and adored. I was terrified and although the…

#178 Name Withheld. CS: 1,2,3,6,7,8. Other: Seemingly irreversible damage to sexual identity

Growing up, I was not talked to about my sexuality in what I would consider a healthy way. I don’t fully blame my parents, because I was not an easy child to have serious or deep conversation with. I was the oldest and always felt it was my responsibility to be the example my family…

#176 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,7

As a teen, I remember being asked if I masturbated in bishop interviews and these questions continued through the mission, my years at BYU, and singles wards after. I became accustomed to the questions and feared every invitation to meet with the bishop, suspecting I would again be asked. In my youth, I lied about…