Some LDS readers might turn a blind eye to stories that don’t fit their worldview of ‘ultimate authority’ and blind trust in leaders. The gospel is the product being distributed through the LDS Church – all the rest is organizational behavior, which is imperfect and even damaging. I know; I have a doctorate in the…
Growing up a girl in the church I was never told that masturbation was wrong; I guess they thought only boys did it. So I started masturbating very young to help me fall asleep. Normal, natural, I didn’t think anything of it. When I was 16 I went for a temple recommend interview with a…
This is a difficult story to tell. I am sharing it now in the hope that it’ll help put pressure on the church to change these horrid policies, or maybe make someone who has been through a similar situation feel less alone. When I was a sophomore in high school, I had a crush on…
My story is complicated. I was sexually abused by family members when I was 5-7, but I didn’t know that’s what it was and didn’t tell anyone. I didn’t feel shame about the abuse, though I imagine my childhood that was full of anxiety and fear could have been because of the sexual abuse. It’s…
Due to the detailed questions, interrogations and guilt shaming I received as a youth in the church, I know have psychological issues with intimacy. I had sex with my husband on our honeymoon and cried because I felt like I had committed a sin….I felt dirty. As a young teen I recall being asked very…
I still have not yet recovered from the damage these interviews caused me when I was younger. It damaged my confidence, shamed me from such an early age and caused me mental problems well into adulthood. At age 11, I attempted suicide because I thought I wasn’t “worthy” enough to go to heaven with my…
My experience going through the Young Men’s program in the LDS Church in California was probably about as good as it could be. I feel very fortunate to have had good leaders and a good father. Scouting was an important part of my experience. However, there is no question that matters of sexual development had…
I rarely had an interview by a bishop or by my own dad that was a bishop that didn’t have some extent of very uncomfortable questions having to do with boys and girls and sexuality. Fortunately I was never asked about masturbation but repeatedly asked over and over about sexual relations. Those did not even…
While I was at college I felt extreme guilt for masturbation. Because of the LDS culture, I was raised to believe I had to confess my sins to the bishop. I went to my bishop and confessed that I had been masturbating. It was also expected to give detail, so I even included details of…
My story is about the pain of ignorance- how we can hurt and be hurt by our false beliefs. It is about how I was hurt when I was sexually assaulted by my LDS boyfriend but blamed myself. It is about how I was hurt by my bishop who was not trained to see my…