From when I was twelve onward, I was asked by my bishop in semi annual interviews sexual questions. He asked me, from when I was 12, if I engaged in petting or necking. I had to ask for clarification about what that meant. He asked me if I watched pornography. I had to ask for clarification about what that meant. He asked me if I masturbated. I had to ask for clarification about what that meant. I became curious about what those things were. My bishop, by asking me those sexual questions when I was still a child, steered me towards pornography and masturbation. I felt such horrific shame that I attempted to castrate myself several times when I was thirteen and fourteen. I was never successful.
I experienced significant cognitive dissonance and self-loathing for a decade and a half, but I developed coping mechanisms that let me operate on a daily basis, including participation in many sport activities. When I broke my leg at sixteen, I lost that coping mechanism and experienced deep suicidal ideation. On my mission, my mission president was renowned for his zero tolerance approach to masturbation, even going so far as to publicly question each missionary at a zone conference if they masturbated in front of all their peers. This public humiliation only deepened my self-loathing.
When I was married, my sexual past became a problem for my wife and I, leading to months bereft of sexual intimacy for both of us.
I met with bishops who asked me sexual questions in one-on-one closed-door meetings as a child and a youth less than 20 times between the ages of 12 and 18, and yet those meetings have had a lifelong detrimental impact on the remainder of my life. It is only now that I have begun the process of healing from the harm that was done to me. For the good of my children, I can not raise them in the church.
For the good of the children who are being raised in the church, this must stop and it must stop everywhere.
No one-on-one interviews. No sexually explicit questions ever!