As the only member in my family, I’ve fought hard to carve a path for myself in this church. As a 15 year old new member I had already experienced sex and reigning in all my previous experience was hard.
I was not accustomed to accountability, least of all to men I didn’t have a relationship with. So I was taken aback when in a Bishop’s youth interview when I was asked if I’d had sex, then further probed about the intimate details. I was asked if there was oral sex. I was asked how often. I was asked when the last time was. I don’t remember much detail, but I do remember the SHAME!
I was put on probation and this meant my not partaking of the sacrament was clearly visible to my peers. More shame. This type of thinking lead me into my first experiences with clinical depression. More of these experiences lead to even deeper depression, especially on my mission.
I love my church but cultural shaming is absolutely rife in it. I’d love to see things change!