Story #2. I was in 8th grade (13) when I had my first ecclesiastical interview. My uncle & his family had come from Seattle to do temple work, & he decided I was old enough to do baptisms with my cousins. I don’t remember being asked.
My mom set up temple recommend interviews. I felt dread because of sexual abuse when I was 8, & told my girl cousin that I was scared. She said that I couldn’t have done anything bad enough yet, but that was beside the point. She was less naive than I was, & told me to say no to whatever question I was asked. Otherwise, I wouldn’t get a recommend and all the family would know.
I don’t remember my bishop interview (a new, gentler bishop) but the Stake President was my intermediate school principal & my English/Civics teacher. I saw him 3 or 4 times a day, every school day. He was very strict. He asked me if I thought I was worthy to go to the temple. I was extremely nervous & almost said no, but shrugged my shoulders. He asked if I lived the law of chastity. I nodded yes. “ Do you masterbate?” I said no. “Do you know what masterbation is?” I nodded yes. “Define it.” I could not. He proceeded to define it as putting your fingers or any other objects in your private girl parts &/or putting fingers or objects in my bottom. I was shocked. Those things had been done to me but I hadn’t thought to do them to myself. Why would I want to! He asked if I let anyone else do those things to me. I remembered my cousin’s advice, saw myself disgraced in front of my family, and said no. A little probing “Are you sure? Are you telling me the truth?” I’m sure I looked as petrified as I felt. But I didn’t crack. I was sure he could tell, but he let me go.
I saw my SP/principal/teacher 3 or 4 times a day for a whole school year. I could never again make eye contact.