When I was 14 I was interviewed for a temple recommend to go with our ward to do baptisms for the dead. It went well until the bishop asked if I was morally clean. I honestly answered yes because I knew I was. He said “I don’t believe you.” I still remember the sick feeling I had about basically being called a liar by a man I believed to be filled with the spirit of discernment. It got worse from there.
B. Do you even know what it means to be morally clean?
B. I don’t think you do. Do you masturbate?
B. I don’t believe you. Do you let boys touch your breasts?
B. I don’t believe you. Do you touch boys on their private parts?
B. I don’t believe you. Do you have sexual relations with boys?
B. I don’t believe you. I know you do things you shouldn’t but I am required to go by your answers in this interview. You know that entering the temple unworthily is a sin. I’m making a note here though so the stake president will know you lied to me.
There were more questions but you get the idea. Using the plural “boys” he was saying I was not only lying but promiscuous as well. And having been through the “crushed rose” and “used chewing gum” lessons in Young Women’s classes I felt horrible that anyone would think I was like that. By the time the interview was over I was in tears and afraid to proceed with the interview with the stake president but I knew I was worthy and really wanted to participate in the baptisms.
The stake president was great. When he asked if I obeyed the law of chastity I answered yes, prepared to be called a liar. He just said ok and signed my recommend. Since that bishop’s interview I have been hyper-aware of doing anything that could be considered sexually promiscuous, even within my marriage! It took lots of counseling and a wonderfully understanding husband to get over the guilt and shame about sex.