I don’t think it only occurs for children in Church private interviews to receive inappropriate questions during private closed door bishop and other Church worthiness interviews.
I was a newly called full time Elder missionary at the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah. My home ward and stake had never set me apart for my new Church full time missionary calling.
Before being ordained and set apart as a full time Elder minister and missionary, I was asked to go over my worthiness qualifications again at the MTC.
I sat in a closed MTC office privately with a man, a Church MTC leader. I forget his name now.
The Church leader in private went down a list of questions, including my moral purity questioning.
The Church leader asked me to explain moral purity, including what was petting. Describe a petting situation I knew.
I really had no idea what the Church definition was exactly of petting. I didn’t really know except petting my family’s pet dogs, or petting pet rabbits when I was a child. I was a recent Church convert. I rambled off something how was it touching someone wrong? My answer was more like a question than an answered response.
There was a question about had I ever participated in “circle jerk” masturbating with my friends. Tell this man what we did.
I felt totally floored being asked that question. I just felt uncomfortable, confused, and strange. I’d never masturbated with my friends. Who did this man with divine powers come up with such unusual worthiness questions?
Even though I was a young adult I felt red faced as he went over my masturbation life.
Earlier before my mission preparation I had masturbated; but, I was a convert. I was really striving, working diligently daily, and praying to stay morally clean and pure. I rambled out some embarrassing ways I tried not to get myself sexually excited. Basically be sexually dead, but didn’t say that word ‘dead’ specifically to the man.
After lots of sexual questions and exploring, the man sat back in his chair.
He looked to me like he was praying with God.
I sat silently waiting.
My heartbeat built, like maybe I’d be sent home? I felt worthy to be a missionary, but maybe I still wasn’t good enough in God’s eyes? Perhaps I hadn’t prayed enough or read the scriptures enough? My nonmember sister had embarrassingly laughed at seeing me praying. Maybe I was not good enough to serve?
The room was silent.
I wondered in fear what to do.
All of a sudden the man burst forward in his seat, his face near my face.
With his accusatory finger pointed straight at my nose, he said to me in a loud commanding voice: “Elder!!! You had sex with chickens!!!”
What??? I replied.
Sex with chickens???
I was just floored.
I didn’t know what to say back to the man inspired by God.
I just sat there embarrassed.
I didn’t even grow up on a farm.
I had never even lived around chickens.
Do guys do this with frozen store chickens I wondered???
I honestly didn’t know what to say or do in response.
I was in total shock.
I had never had sex with any chicken, but imagined in my head what this older man witnessed me by holy powers to have somehow evilly performed.
Rape upon helpless chickens???
I apologetically explained how I had no want or way, or ever even a dream or desire to wish to hurt or harm a poor little defenseless innocent hen, rooster, or whatever he believed; furthermore, to have sex with a chicken in a nonconsenting sexual relationship with a harmless feathered fowl is just so strange and deviant and out there I never even considered imagining doing that.
I kept imagining in my head thinking how does this man called of God even get this odd notion of me having sex with chickens in his head???
Me making carnal or passionate love to chickens???
I’m not from Utah, so maybe it’s a local problem I wondered?
Are boys or young men picking up chickens or going on dates with chickens instead of sister’s a secret Church sin I missed hearing about?
Is it something Church children learn in Family Home Evenings?
Are missionaries more sexually deviant or curious than I ever knew?
Is the raping of chickens something I missed taught in church classes, or in the temple?
A million thoughts raced through my mind.
Throughout my setting apart ceremony as a newly ordained Church missionary all I could think was this man sincerely thought I had sex with chickens!!!
I felt abhorred, filled with shame and confusion.
I couldn’t even concentrate on his words as he ordained me, his hands grasping my skull, this man probably thinking my head matched the perfect size and weight of a Rhode Island Red!!! Did he know about this stuff with chickens by his own sins.
I prayed as he held my head he didn’t think I was a chicken he could take liberty on while I held my eyes closed.
It’s like I felt he thought I was a big liar, a big sinner, unworthy, but just I was now too supposedly too evil to admit to him my supposed feathered friends “sin”???
I actually let that Church man leader touch my head!
Right after my Church worthiness interview.
Setting me apart as a Church missionary.
“I set you apart, you secret chicken loving rapist!” I imagined him silently secretly saying to himself about me.
I was supposedly being called by God, yet accused by his holy leader to be incorrectly accused of being a poultry pedophile.
I just felt sad and very terrible feeling inside.
As the laying on of hands setting me apart was spoken, I kept asking myself: Was this man’s divine power ordaining me as a minister to preach the gospel real? Or was he just hungry for some KFC, and got his spiritual thoughts crossed? Should I be thankful, such as at least he didn’t accuse me of doing something sexual with mashed potatoes or bread rolls???
I kept afterward saying to myself maybe the spiritual wiring got mixed up.
Maybe it was supposed to be some other missionary accused of chicken abuse.
Maybe there is a missionary at the MTC who gets sexually aroused seeing a chicken, or hearing a chicken cluck. Hopefully that missionary was not sent to a mission with lots of chickens and birds in it running around.
The experience of being accused of being a chicken rapist Church member really messed with my head.
It sometimes still challenges my spiritual faith today.
I have never spoken about it to a Church leader because they might think I have a secret problem with chickens.