When I was 19 years old, my boyfriend (at the time) and I ended up having intercourse. My boyfriend was overcome with guilt and called the bishop for us to go and confess. We sat together and he asked a few questions but was kind and polite. He asked me to step out so he could talk to the boyfriend. After a couple minutes he (boyfriend) came out and told me to go in.
I went in and spent 15 minuets being prodded about all the sexual behaviors that we may have done. The bishop asked me explicit sexual questions that made me more uncomfortable that the actual act. He stared at me until I replied and if I said yes or no he asked me to respond with more l detail.
A year and a half later, I was at my apartment (in the same ward) and a different ex boyfriend came by to talk. He digitally raped me in my bedroom. When I told that same bishop what had happened he looked at me, then looked away and said “You need to do better” and made it clear how disappointed he was. I went home feeling like I was crazy and believing that it was my fault. I was so confused and depressed that I made plans to kill myself to end the shame of what I had allowed to happen.