This is the story of my two children. One MIA night, my son, 17 and my daughter 14, were called into the bishop’s office separately. This couldn’t have been a birthday yearly interview because their birthdays were months apart. One in March and the other in May. It was an unscheduled, no appointment, impromptu interview, separately, and alone with each.
Each was brought into the Bishop’s office and the door was locked. Each was told that they would not be allowed to leave until they confessed to masturbation. My 17 year old resisted until he realized the Bishop wasn’t kidding around and that he wouldn’t be allowed to leave unless he confessed. He confessed. He was mortified, and felt deprived of his privacy, and self. He was never allowed to get his ordination as an elder from this man. He had to go to a student ward two years later to get that, and to receive a mission call. This bishop used this confession to claim he wasn’t worthy.
My daughter had a greater emotional impact on her life, as she didn’t know what it was and was crying profusely when she came home. I asked her what was going on and she cried out, “What is mazzerbation Mom?” She had no idea what it was all about. She was so traumatized by this experience that she had night terrors and nightmares for over a year.
That night, however, I was so upset that I called the Stake president. I told him what had occurred with my two children and he said, “Oh I know Bishop ‘—–‘ personally to be the best kind of man, I am sure he would never do such a thing.” I told him that he indeed had and my daughter was utter traumatized. He said that he couldn’t believe it and said he had to go.
I called SLC, and of course the offices were closed, but there was a man on duty to take calls. I told him what happened and he said it was a terrible thing and he would take a message and report this situation to the Brethren. Apparently he did just that as our stake president received a letter the very next week which he gave to the bishops. He also called me and told me about this letter which stated that bishops were not to ask the youth about specific things like masturbation any more.
My daughter refused to go back to church until she was old enough to go to a student ward. I feel she never really got over it, because she suffered a divorce a few years later from a husband that was sleeping around because she wasn’t giving him what he needed. Interpret that however you please.. but for me,… it stemmed from trauma of a sexual nature in her early teens.