This is very difficult so I’ll make it short. I was damaged quite badly by the shame I felt for so called sins and transgressions. I feel like I was conditioned to talk about things of a sexual nature to older men which I feel made it easier for a predator to sink his teeth into me at 16 years old. He approached me as I was on a scout backpacking trip and asked for my phone number. I gave it to him because he seemed like a cool person. Almost immediately he started asking me sexual questions over the phone and I was reluctant and scared but compliant. He would keep calling over and over. I felt like I had to talk to him for some reason. I measured my penis at his request because he said oral sex is better if you’re bigger. Now, I had never been with another person sexually so he was explaining things to me for the first time. He then tried to convince me to meet him at a hotel room. Thankfully I was able to break away from the predator before anything worse happened. I’ve told very few people about this and it’s just one example of the negative impact that worthiness interviews have had on my life. I lived most of my life feeling worthless. I’ve harmed myself and attempted to end my life on multiple occasions. I’m happily married with children now but there are still times when I’m not strong enough on my own and my darling wife rescues me.
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