#211 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,4,8

1. Inappropriate shame and guilt, 2. Childhood self-loathing, 4. Grooming, 8. Suicide Ideation, Consequence Stories

My bishop was hardcore on the masturbation interviews. They started at 10 because he wanted to be sure that he could “identify worthiness issues” before we became deacons. In my interviews, my bishop started with 20-30 minutes of explaining what masturbation was – graphically describing how it could happen without us using our hands, that…

#210 Landon H. CS: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10

1. Inappropriate shame and guilt, 10. Suicide of a loved one or friend, 2. Childhood self-loathing, 3. Adulthood self-loathing, 4. Grooming, 5. Sexual abuse, 6. Impaired sexual relations after marriage, 7. Years of recovery from childhood shaming, 8. Suicide Ideation, 9. Attempted Suicide, Consequence Stories

Sam, July 2nd of 2017 was the first day I had been sober in over a decade. Between drugs and alcohol I had a heavy regiment of self-medication. There was good reason for that self-medicating. I continue that sobriety and am on day 205 as I compile this story the best I can. 2 1/2…

#209 Melissa B. CS: 1,2,3,6,7,8,9

1. Inappropriate shame and guilt, 2. Childhood self-loathing, 3. Adulthood self-loathing, 6. Impaired sexual relations after marriage, 7. Years of recovery from childhood shaming, 8. Suicide Ideation, 9. Attempted Suicide, Consequence Stories

I was eight years old when I was sexually abused, I didn’t even understand what had happened really, I just knew it felt wrong and scary. I was very confused and somehow decided it was my fault because I had been baptized. I didn’t tell anyone what had happened, I was ashamed, I thought no…

#208 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,6,7,8

1. Inappropriate shame and guilt, 2. Childhood self-loathing, 3. Adulthood self-loathing, 6. Impaired sexual relations after marriage, 7. Years of recovery from childhood shaming, 8. Suicide Ideation, Consequence Stories

Growing up LDS, sex and sexual topics were a taboo topic that we never talked about in our home. When I began to experience sexual feelings, I felt like I must be a pervert. I was a young girl and young girls weren’t supposed to have such thoughts and feelings. It was understandable for boys…

#207 Marissa S. CS: 1,2,3,6,7

1. Inappropriate shame and guilt, 2. Childhood self-loathing, 3. Adulthood self-loathing, 6. Impaired sexual relations after marriage, 7. Years of recovery from childhood shaming, Consequence Stories

By all accounts, my childhood was pretty perfect. I grew up in the church, had awesome friends, leaders, and experiences. My dad was my bishop until my early teens, then a friend’s dad was called and he was my bishop throughout high school. I went to him a few times after going “too far” with…

#206 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,4,6,7

1. Inappropriate shame and guilt, 2. Childhood self-loathing, 4. Grooming, 6. Impaired sexual relations after marriage, 7. Years of recovery from childhood shaming, Consequence Stories

I had a Bishop that I went to after being sexually assaulted, as a child. My parents thought that this interview would help me, as nobody wanted to report what happened. They thought by talking to the Bishop this would help me heal. Instead, he asked me questions that were not appropriate or healing, I…

#205 Name Hidden. CS: 1,2,3,6,7

1. Inappropriate shame and guilt, 2. Childhood self-loathing, 3. Adulthood self-loathing, 6. Impaired sexual relations after marriage, 7. Years of recovery from childhood shaming, Consequence Stories

As a young man I felt incredibly guilty about masturbation. I felt like I was the only one with this “sin” and that it made me a horrible person. The Bishop interviews were humiliating and I found myself lying so that I could progress through the ranks of deacon, teacher, priest -like the other kids.…