I am not sure if this story is being shared in the appropriate place. But I wanted my thoughts to go with Sam to his probable excommunication.
When my daughter was 8 she was going in for her interview with our Bishop. She wanted me to come in, she was nervous. I was going to go in with her and the Bishop stopped me and said I wasn’t allowed. To my absolute shame, I accepted that and stayed out of the office, waiting for her. Now that I am older and wiser and more educated, I realized I didn’t have to listen to the Bishop. I could have gone in or not allowed her to go in. I didn’t know that. I didn’t know I could question the Bishop. I thought I had to do what ever he said or I was a bad member of the church for doubting his word. I’m angry that he took my parenting rights away from me, and I let him do it without question. I am angry at him and I am angry at myself and embarrassed. We teach children they have no power. The practice we do in our church is called grooming. I worked at an internship with sex offenders and sex offenders use methods like this. We are teaching our children that it is okay or normal to be alone with men they hardly know. It is NOT safe. Not for them, not for the Bishop.
I work with a rape victim. Her Bishop asked her many questions that “creeped” her out. This happened after she was already interrogated improperly by detectives that put blame on her. She has years of recovery. Untrained people have no business discussing these things with victims. Two people in an interview would help keep this in check! It only makes sense.
I work with a kid who wants to kill himself and he had the means and a plan to do so . Because he masturbates. Most of the boys in the world are doing this and he wants to kill himself over it. Babies have been documented doing this in the womb, and this beautiful. amazing kid wants to kill himself over it. Bishops should not be handling these tough situations. It puts them in a vulnerable situation as well as the children they are working with.
My son was asked if he masturbated in a Bishop’s interview. He was 12 and said he didn’t know what it meant. Never told me until 5 years later. I am furious. No one has a right to ask my son about his private body.