I was about 14 when I first started to confront my sexual feelings. Every time I masturbated a feeling of intense guilt and shame would come over me. I wondered what was wrong with me, and why I couldn’t resist. I prayed intensely for heavenly fathers help to overcome my pornography and masturbation “addiction.” For about a year I was deeply depressed because I just couldn’t stop. I eventually found my way out of the church mentally, but since I’m still technically a member I have to do bishop interviews. When I was 17 I was called in by my bishop for a routine interview. This was my first with the new bishop. He asked me the normal questions, then asked how I was with porn and masturbation. I don’t like to lie so I told him I do it sometimes. He asked me how often. He asked me when was the last time. I was intensely uncomfortable and I’ll never forget that experience.
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