When my oldest son was approaching his 12th birthday, he came to me and told me he didn’t want to be interviewed by the bishop without me, his mom, in the room. I told him that was fine, that I would talk to the bishop and arrange it. Soon after that, the executive secretary called to make an appointment with my husband. I asked him what the appointment was for and he told me he couldn’t tell me. I then chose to inform him that I would be in the room when my 11 yr old was interviewed. He told me I wouldn’t be and had the bishop call me.
I was sitting at my kitchen table and the phone rang, I was already shaking. The conversation didn’t go well, especially since he reminded me that that evening was priesthood preview, and we had a home-teaching visit scheduled with the 1st counselor in the bishopric. I told him I would be in the room, he told me I would not be in the room, I told him even scouting has 2 deep leadership rule. He said, someone would be in the adjoining room. I told him that wasn’t good enough. He told me someone might be able to be in the room with my son, but it wouldn’t be me, I would never be me.
I told him it was against the law for him to interview my son alone without my permission and he told me it wasn’t. I told him I would be in the room or the interview wouldn’t happen. He told me to take it up with the stake president, but his call was final. I told him his secrecy proved the church was crap and hung up on him. At that point things got UGLY. I called the non emergency police line and asked them about the law, and they confirmed that only one custodial parent’s permission was needed to interview my son alone. I went inside where my husband was waiting and told him our son wouldn’t be interviewed alone without me. My husband told me I was possessed of a demon and raised his arm to the square and commanded Satan to leave my body. I was shocked, I put the phone down and told him I wasn’t possessed and never had been. My husband told me he didn’t recognize me and the only explanation was demon possession.
I tried to call the home-teachers and cancel the visit, but my husband grabbed my phone and since he is a foot taller than me and 100 lbs heavier, he won. I never got the phone, I was trying to grab it when the doorbell rang. My husband answered the door and they came in. The first counselor’s partner was a young man, who as a minor I was not willing to harm by having a public confrontation. So, I sat through an entire lesson on the priesthood chain linking each man back to Jesus’s priesthood authority and a testimony meeting on the power of the priesthood. Then the home-teacher told my son he was taking him to priesthood preview, at that point I stood up and told them he had already given the entire lesson and told my son to get in the van RIGHT NOW. He did, we left for 2 hours and then came home. Life has been hell since then.
I protected my children and I don’t regret it, but my entire life fell apart that day. My husband doesn’t respect me, he thinks I have no morals, my family and his family think I am crazy. I lost my community, have had interventions in my behalf, had letters written to me, lost business, etc. I have never done drugs, gone on a drinking rampage, had an affair, broken the law intentionally, etc, but my standing is diminished to nothing because one man decided that I had no voice, my wishes were irrelevant, his power superseded my role as a mother. For that, I lost almost everything and my husband, well he sees no problem with the bishop’s behavior, only mine.