One of my first interviews that I can remember happened when I was 12. I felt fine about meeting the bishop. He asked me if I obeyed the law of chastity. Fully believing I had, I answered in the affirmative. He questioned back with ‘are you sure?’ still fully believing in myself, I said Yep! Then he caught me off guard and asked ‘I believe you masturbate and don’t follow the law’
I was shook. 1) I had no idea what masturbation was. 2) I had been taught that bishops would receive revelation for you during these interviews, so I believed as an impressionable 12 year old that he must be right. I admitted my guilt, not even knowing what I was guilty of.
I was told I couldn’t pass or take the sacrament. That I was to read the miracle of forgiveness, and I was given plenty of quotes and stories about how ‘its better to die than lose your virtue.’
Then I fully believed I had done something wrong and was punished for it. I fell into a self hatred spiral that pushed me deep into suicidal and castration thoughts. All because I believed this bishop was inspired to ask me this question.
But now? I see it for what it truly was. A blatant abuse of power over a 12 year old boy. It was a disgusting act, and it shouldn’t have happened and it should never happen again.
I will not let my children be in a room alone and asked any sexual related question. Nope, not even if they obey the law of chastity. That is not their place, and I won’t stand for my kids to be treated how I was.
These questions don’t need to tolerated.